“I didn’t know boxes give birth” I said to one of my dear friends who asked how I was settling into our new home.
That is exactly how I felt and I was not liking it. My perceived “dark side” — doubtful, perfectionistic, and questioning everything — started showing up. My first instinct was to avoid those aspects of myself. Yet over the years I have learned how to embrace them knowing that my light and dark sides exist in relationship to each other, and are available to help me reach a higher potential and live more fully.
For a couple of days I let my dark side play, allowing the full range of my humanness to take place. I observed and allowed myself to feel all my feelings instead of trying to distract or suppress them.
I also remembered to get inspired through one of my favorite poems from Rumi:
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
The poem tells us that embracing the rhythms of life, the light and the dark, the contraction and the expansion, the joy and the pain helps us to get authentic, which is the way back to joy.
When I realized that, through my two days of reflection, I became comfortable with everything that I was feeling, and was more able to relax and enjoy each moment. And in celebration, I bought roses for myself. Because boxes and roses belong together!
Next time uncomfortable feelings and thoughts are showing up for you, instead of distracting yourself with busy-ness or addiction or obsession of any kind, try to be mindful and sit with the uncomfortable parts of your experience. Allow yourself to BE, so that you can draw from your inner capacity and grow. It is a good step on the path to a more fulfilled life. Enjoy!